homesickness | Hostels and Hot Rollers

I didn’t think that the last leg of our travels would be this hard.

With 6 days left before we touchdown back home, I’m finding it more and more difficult to fight homesickness. My mind constantly wanders to my family and friends, and I find myself planning all sorts of things that I want to do when I get back. These feelings have resulted in days seeming long, and some moments where, well, I’ve been kinda miserable

There…I said it. I’ve been a grumpy bear this week. Poor Shaun has had to deal with a very homesick wife.

Of course, I recognize I need to change my tune. I’m actively choosing fear over love. If I’m not careful I’m going to waste the last few previous moments I have on this adventure looking forward instead of standing still.

I often find myself taking moments to appreciate my surroundings, but it is always in obvious ways, like when I’m watching a sunset of when I’m laying in a hammock. In those moments, its easy to be present, and appreciate the beauty and tranquillity that surrounds me

It’s the mundane times that I find challenging. Evenings where it is dark early, and no amount of Netflix or crazy eights are going to keep me entertained. Or days where I’m faced with a very hot walk to the store to get groceries. There are so many instances during my day where my mind wanders, I start thinking about home, I get lonely and I’m no longer present.

I started reading about ways to “be in the moment” and although I agree with most things I’ve read, I still didn’t really know how I was going to go about doing it. It’s easy for me to be present when I’m reading something about it, but as soon as I put my book down, I forget. The mind is a powerful thing and it will wander where it wants to wander.

I needed a concrete exercise to help me stay present, so I chose a day last week and decided to make myself a reminder.

I set an alarm on my phone for every hour. Whenever it went off, I took note about what I was thinking about. Most of the time it was about home, or something in the future. I took a second to appreciate that thought and let it come to an end.

Then, I took a deep breath and really looked at my surroundings. I would to myself, what am I grateful for in this moment? What do I want to remember? It didn’t have to be big things. Some of the things I noticed were all of the hibiscus in bloom, the amazing feeling of walking into a room with a/c, or a wicked huge Iguana. All things that I know I won’t have when I get home.

Taking time to appreciate and feel grateful for those little things helped keep me in the present moment.

This exercise totally falls into the “practice makes perfect” category. I found that after doing it for a while, it started to happen naturally. Now I have an alarm set for twice a day, but find I’m finding I am much more naturally present throughout the entire day.

So, if you are every finding yourself in a situation where you are spending to much time looking back or looking forward, try this exercise to help train yourself to stand still.

For more on the evolution of my philosophies and “kateness” visiting my Philosophy page.

Pura Vida!

Kate

Follow me on Twitter: @caketress

Hola Brother Sean,

There is a part of me that feels safe writing whatever I want for your birthday. Why you might ask? Because of the countless times you have told me that you don’t read my blog.

So I feel liberated. I feel I could tell my readers anything, and everything about my “little” brother, and you wouldn’t be the wiser.

I could tell them about the time I dressed you up as Sporty Spice complete with a sports bra and pony tail made of yarn. I could then tell them that you then willingly and without being asked did the worm while having the whole thing video taped.

Or I could tell them about the time you wore a hula skirt, tighty whities, coconut bra and a clown wig and then posed for a photo.

I could even post that photo at this very moment, because really, what are big sisters for.

But alas, I’ve matured in my older age. None of these moments will be posted on the blog. Besides, then I wouldn’t have any material for your wedding.

No, no, instead I think I’ll write something different. Something a little more fitting for the occasion.

There are a lot of people in my life that know me really well.There are friends who have been with me since high school, people who have watched me grow up and mature. But there is only one person who has been with me through absolutely everything. That would be you.

No seriously, I couldn’t have gotten rid of you even if I tried!

I often hear people talk about how much they fought with their siblings growing up. How growing up with their brothers and sisters was such a challenge.

I just don’t think we had that. My memories of growing up with you are nothing but positive. Whether or not that is because you let me be the boss all the time remains to be seen. Either way, I look back on my childhood with a smile, and that has a lot to do with the awesome times we had together (think sealbert, spiderman and syrup)

But it’s not our upbringing that makes our relationship so special, it’s actually these awesome adults we’ve morphed into over the years (sidenote: I like to think of us morphing more like Captain Planet then Power Rangers).

I think there is something in our genes that turns us both into stand-up comedians when we are together. The only glitch is that the jokes we make are often only hilarious to us. There is no one in the world who can bring me to a full on belly laugh quicker then you. (insert poop joke here)

I also am not sure how, but you’ve also managed to become a wise little gaffer. Several times during this trip I found myself reaching out to you for “help” when things were getting tricky. Whether I’m down the street, or in another country, you are always there to talk me down.

Little brother, I honestly couldn’t imagine my life without you. Thank you for everything you have done for me. From making sure our diabetic cat doesn’t die while we are away (an extremely tall order) to performing Shaun and I’s marriage ceremony (another particularly tall order). I admire the way to live your life and how you encourage your older sister to do the same.

So the Happiest of Happy Birthday’s to you dear “Boner”, you gift is on its way….PS..it’s me in 10 days 😉

Pura Vida!

Kate